From a culture that teaches us that we belong to men, to God, and to the society that objectifies us, this is my photo essay of the brave women who have undergone a personal transformation on the way they view the world, and more importantly- themselves.
When I set out to do this project, I knew I was asking a lot of the women who would be a part of it. It is incredibly brave to be so vulnerable in front of another person, especially when that person holds a camera that will share the image of your body with the world. I have been humbled and awed by the women in this series. They are remarkable in countless ways. I felt as a Mormon woman myself, I needed to show them that I have that same courage, so I turned the camera around. Thanks mostly to excellent parenting, I grew up with a fairly healthy body image and sense of self. But as an adult woman, I have struggled with feeling like my body was not entirely my own– it belonged to my husband, to my children, and ultimately, to my God more than it did to me. It has taken a drastic change in perspective for me to reclaim my own body for myself. It is not perfect by the standards of beauty magazines and runways. Like many of us, I should move more often and eat less sugar. But it is strong. It has birthed two babies without drugs. It experiences pleasure and pain. It is soft and firm. It has scars and stretch marks. And it is beautiful. And it is mine. 
“I am not afraid to be naked anymore. I am not afraid to look like a woman, and I am not afraid to acknowledge the power that emanates from female sexuality. No wonder it is repressed; such a potent force threatens to change the world. I embrace the drive at the cost of my place within my religious community. I have disappointed my Savior. Right? Slut. This is what some people see. As for me, I can feel the split within me lessening, diminishing, whispering to me of a new life. I am not a slut. I am whole.”
“Two miscarriages and over two and a half years of trying left me with little faith in myself, in my body, or in God. The insidious idea that by keeping my daughter I had somehow forfeited the right to other children was deeply rooted and long-lasting. With the birth of my twins last fall, something very deep was healed inside of me. Something that was taken had been restored. I was convinced for months that it was not meant to be, that I’d lose them just as I’d lost my other pregnancies, and it wasn’t until they were pink and screaming that it truly sunk in that I would really get to keep them. Body shaming is a particularly favorite rock when stoning the proverbial harlot. To have my fertility used against me, made into a sin, is one of the greatest wrongs I have had to weather. For my body’s beautiful capacity for life to be turned into shame took my daughter’s infancy from me, gave me years of self-doubt and hatred, was the source of blame for my lost babies. To have to hide your first pregnancy, to be so often put down and so infrequently congratulated, to feel so small and so alone is something that no woman should have to bear. Our bodies and our children are our own, in a way that nothing else can ever be, in a way no man or church or God can understand.”
“Just three months later, I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, prepared to peel my garments off. I no longer believed in the Church. Thus, I thought it wrong to remain clothed in covenants which no longer controlled me.”Mormon Women Bare:
A young girl is shamed by her friends for not dressing “modestly” enough. A BYU student is chastised via note from a male student for wearing leggings. A BYU-Idaho student is not allowed to take a test because her jeans are “form fitting”. After hearing these stories and others in 2012, I threw up my hands in exasperation. What on earth is going on in this culture? I don’t remember it being like this when I was a child and teen growing up in the church. Why has the modesty culture of the LDS church gotten so extreme and what can we do about it?
Women around the world deal with objectification, body shame, and the burden of the male gaze. Mormon women have an added layer of complexity and heavy expectations: while being warned against becoming “walking pornography,” we also face immense pressure to be attractive and fit. We must both attract and protect against male desire. Even though Mormonism teaches us our destiny is to become like our embodied Heavenly Parents, the hyper-focus on modesty leaves many of us feeling disconnected and ambivalent about our bodies. Our sense of self can feel so eclipsed by the expectation to be a wife and mother that we no longer see our bodies as our own. Separated from our skin by layers of clothing, many Mormon women lose touch with the capabilities and power we innately possess. Mormon Women Bare seeks to empower women to reclaim our bodies. Through photography and personal narratives, women are seen as beautiful, flawed, vulnerable and real. Women of different shapes, sizes, and ages demonstrate that bodies need not bring shame but can be owned, celebrated, and honored.
In a previous project, I used photography to help normalize breastfeeding. I found that the more we see something, the more normal and less taboo it becomes. Knowing that images can be very powerful tools for change and being familiar with photographer Matt Blum’s The Nu Project, I was inspired to do something similar with Mormon women. I decided that including each woman’s own words along with her photograph would help put the viewer in a position of empathy and compassion, instead of critique and objectification.
By showing women’s bodies as natural, normal, and diverse, I feel we can help combat the shame many women feel about our bodies. When we can see that most of the women around us are imperfect and yet so full of beauty, courage, and light, we begin to have more compassion for ourselves. In this project you will see women photographed in comfortable places, most often in their own home. Each woman exhibited some nerves as I began photographing her, but soon relaxed and settled into ease with her body. I was so humbled by their bravery and vulnerability. Many of them have expressed what an empowering experience being part of this project has been for them. My hope is that everyone who sees these images and reads these women’s stories will walk away having internalized the truth that women are more than bodies to be objectified or discounted, and more than their so-called “virtue”- they are whole and complex individuals of extraordinary capabilities and strength.
I am still photographing models to add to the series. If you are interested, particularly if you are a woman of color, over the age of 45, or have a unique story to tell, please contact me here.”
